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Writer's pictureMicah N. Dillon

Can God? - Part 1



Welcome to another Monday with Micah. Thank you for being a part of this community. I want to unpack with you today this thought that came to me: 

Can you continue to love and maintain a grin from ear to ear while tears of sadness are on the inside? 

As I look back over my life, loving with tears released a level of truth and joy that lead me to truly believe God was good even in troubled times. As I write now, tears are flowing down my cheek. Some are tears of sadness from my past and some are tears of joy for my present. 

This subject is deep. I do not know all the answers. I do not have a seminary degree. I do not know Greek. I do not know much, but what I do know is Jesus and what I have witnessed.

One of the things I’ve lived through is pain, and I have walked with it day and night. I also know joy and have seen it peak out, like the game Peak-A-Boo you play with a toddler. Over the last three years, I have learned so much, but this one particular thing stands out: PAIN and JOY have become friends within my soul.

The questions I present to you below are tough to absorb, but let’s not run from what we all feel. So today, we are going to not only feel, but fill the despair and allow the Holy Spirit and our Loving Father to repair. As we find a tear and mend it while we’re there, we can share. 

I hope it’s okay to get honest here. If so, buckle up. Here we go together. 🚌

1. Can God really be good in the pain?

2. Can God really be present in my sadness?

3. Can God love me when bad things happen?

4. Can God heal my hurting heart?

5. Can God bring new joy?

6. Can God really bring me more joy?

7. Can God hear my broken heart?

8. Can God rescue me?

9. Can God make me whole?

10. Can God find all my shattered pieces?

11. Can God heal me so I can heal others?

12. Can God bring me hope?

Can He? Can He?

Have you ever pondered these questions in your heart and mind? Well, after losing my husband out of nowhere and finding myself asking all these questions, I believe I have gained some wisdom along the way. So, I want to walk with you in this journey of pain and joy. 

I will write on these twelve questions over the next four weeks. There is so much to unpack, but I believe Jesus has a mission for me to leave you here every week with a new full back pack of God’s love. This will allow you and me to fill up, and then go and feel up others with His love, even in our pain. 

So, grab a cup of coffee, some tissues and my hand, and let’s have a chat together about....CAN GOD? 

First question...Can God Really Be Good in the Pain?

Let’s say it this way: Can feelings of goodness and pain coexist? The answer is a big fat YES. Through the last three years of processing loss, I have found that emotions should never be feared. Emotions are guides to your next breakthrough. There is a statement I have heard that says, “Don’t let your emotions drive the car”, but you don’t need to put them in the trunk either. They need to be in the back seat or passenger seat. You see them and are aware of them, but they don’t get to drive.

Pain is a human emotion. What we attach to that pain is another story. Are we attaching dirty pain or clean pain? Dirty pain is attaching shame, guilt, or regret to your loss. Clean pain is feeling the emotions, but not attaching negativity to it. I like to call it, A Good Grief. You look for the goodness through the grief. I learned this statement from a life coaching class I took online called Living Fully Alive by Justin and Abi Stumvoll. It opened my eyes to feelings, and wow, did I find out something about myself! I have a lot of feelings!

Can God Really Be Present in My Sadness?

Again, the answer is YES. I started asking for proof that my Heavenly Father was near. I asked for signs through His creations, and I hope you will ask him too. The signs started with a rainbow the day after the celebration of life service for my husband. It was the first sign of promise. And then came dolphins, shooting stars, feathers, and fireflies. I have said love doesn’t end after death—it’s the expression of it that changes. I may not feel the tangible touch from my husband, but I feel his touch in many other ways on a regular basis. At the end of the day, it’s my Heavenly Father’s touch, but what I realized is that it has a similar feeling. And, I’m so thankful to say the God in him helped me trust it was the presence of someone beyond my reach, but yet, felt oh so sweet. 

Can God Love Me When Bad Things Happen?

CAN WE ALL SAY IT TOGETHER, YES!! While working on a speech, this truth came out for me: God did not stop loving me even though He rewarded my loving husband with Heaven. You have to look for the good. It’s a choice to be thankful when in the middle of the messy season of your life. I woke up. I choose to learn, grow, read, write, pray, talk, walk, cry, eat, and do it all over again and again. You can do it too. 

That wraps up the first three questions. Please tell others about this blog. Invite them to comment. Invite them to share. This is about us, those that have walked a different path, and we need each other. I like to say, “Grieving together makes everything better.”

Have a great week. Take your backpack of love and unpack it as you feel it out on others. 

See you next week. Until then, pain and joy are friends, and they can smile from ear to ear as you bring others your cheer, and let them know you are dearly loved and never alone, because Jesus is alive and on the throne. 


If this blog didn't bring you joy, here is a song to lift your spirits:

"Joy and Pain" by Rob Base and DJ E Z Rock: https://youtu.be/PD5MCphMAoc

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